Recently, this topic is becoming increasingly important. In all the family forums, wherever you look: “Where would a child to work? No one knows with any age can be little children to work to arrange “and the apotheosis:” People! Anyone paying children for homework? ”
Or here’s an interesting twist: “Do you think, whether it is necessary to teach a child to physical labor?” And the length-and-branch innaya discussion.
We remember her the Pioneer and Komsomol past labor (who it was) – who nostalgically, who in disgust, a younger generation of parents’ experience of survival divided into the hungry 90s: “We rescued the garden. No one even wondered if we want or do not want it, we dig. It was the food. The food at all costs. ”
And now, when children eat almost anything – why would they work?
Why do people work
Strange question, you might say. Firstly, for a living, and secondly – to socialize people to respect that status was acceptable to be proud of. Thirdly, it is necessary to somehow kill time, all the time chasing boring noodle.
I spent a small survey among the students of the first year at the university: 50 people are working two, one girl earns a living, and the other – the travel-entertainment. That’s all. I began to ask how others live, surely all parents oligarchs?
No, the oligarchs in this particular university in the afternoon with fire not to find, ordinary families, more or less successful. But the kids really do not wish to strain, it is easier to give up any dreams than steam. That is where there live, give breakfast and dinner, a fashionable phone for my birthday every year, give – and thanks for that. Their eyes are not on.
When you talk to these young people about the future, it affects just a complete lack of dreams. They do not want anything, such kvazibuddisty: content with small, not zarsya for more – and you will have happiness. Career? Somehow formed, attach, mother’s, father’s friends to help, relatives in Moscow, many …
My peers, who are now in the mass leaders and bosses constantly complain about this phenomenon comes to be hired a graduate, in the eyes of longing, of his mother’s stick doplelsya to the office, my father agreed to the interview. “What do you want?” – “I do not know …” – “What can you do?” – “Oh, nothing in general …” – “What you want to do?” – “Yes, I do not care …”
Here you can tweak our microscope, which looked at the younger generation, and to try to identify the types and characters. And then to the causes of the phenomenon and the generalizations it comes.
I mean Muscovites in the second-and-so-forth generation, or whose parents made their way to the capital in the early 90’s, or have lived there, but the restructuring were forced to build a life from scratch. We worked three jobs, changed their specialty, can be ruined again be rich. Create business and grow professionally.
Their children at this time go to private kindergartens (municipalities have been “repurposed” for offices of firms), then in private schools (from municipal children come in the afternoon, but at home there is no one to night), then acted in private universities (public competition, and it is difficult to do). Kids-candy. Parents have mixed feelings towards them. On the one hand – krovinochka heir, everything for him. “I work to you all there!” – The cry of a desperate mother. On the other – freeloader, a finger does not hit, help from him you will not wait, pants sit behind a computer all day or dangle the boutiques. Sheer frustration and shame.
Parents motylyaet between guilt and resentment. They are totally confused and angry at the same time. After all, they, really, it’s all arranged for the children, not for yourself weather the same 14-hour day with two weeks of vacation a year. But why such a strange (albeit predictable) result?
Quite a different position are those families where the parents failed to protect children from the hardships of young independent life. As practice shows, where children pulled by themselves on trips his father, gave them all possible tasks at their summer cottage, is attached to the work of years with 14 (instead of sending in language camps), and the relationship easier and closer, and the children cheerful look and parents do not suffer any guilt complex about “weaned child”.
Because children do not need a hassle-free childhood in commercials. They are people too. They initially much more interesting and dad drill-fix, with mum oven pies, or vice versa – from the mother to build a gazebo, and a dad to cook pilaf. During the Renaissance in Europe, the children had toys in this sense – something for fun. And there were a small copy of the instruments of labor, so that children learn to live in a modern society it.
And what do our children?
Learn, learn and learn again. English, Chinese, logic, rhetoric, mathematics. Ballroom dancing, Taekwondo, piano and flute. In between wet monsters or create the farm “in contact”. And this infinite and rather heavily absolutely useless and fruitless study is presented as a major work, and the duty of the child.
Parents forums seriously discussing the issue: whether to consider studies in physical labor? Pardon me, gentlemen, physical labor – is to dig up the beds “on the fence before lunch,” shipping bags, wash floors, in the end. All these mental exercises are presented with sauce “we are preparing the child for adulthood, accustom it to work.”
But the nine-year evolutionary already adapted to the physical and unskilled labor, and the 12-year-old man is quite able to replace the adult at the bench, and that was during the war. The most important thing at this age are interested in the real work of any child much more than an abstract science.
And the labor camps? One hundred hormonal teens on huge apple trees like monkeys, labor competition, volleyball in the evening after work, dancing with the local guys … And where, pray tell, is now put in the summer these hard workers? Again spend exorbitant amounts on their more or less meaningful leisure, instead of sending them to earn money.
Incidentally, all the money we gave to parents, even had no idea that you can spend them on yourself. While some friends of the parents then the money to buy something very valuable: Japanese bike or jacket.
They stayed in the province of mom and dad, high school, gray life without any prospects, because those who have prospects in his native city, in Moscow did not go. And at first it is necessary to very hard times, but they are trying hard. Highly. Because the bridges are burned, and no turning back.
I always wondered what this said and did their parents, so that they grew so active and reaching goals. Almost 100% of the story is as follows.
Provincial small town, the entire infrastructure is tied to one or two companies, a big wealth in the family was not, but the parents and not to upahivalis stars before my eyes. On weekends skiing or you go for a visit.
As an option – Dad drank, or did not exist, while his mother worked to exhaustion, and son decided in whatever was to save her from poverty. Sometimes parents go into debt to pay for admission to a daze Moscow University, then his motivation to achieve grows to the sky: the credibility to be paid.
And from early childhood a child taught that he can achieve great things if it is to work hard. Compare with the mantra of Muscovites: “The main thing – to get into the right university and the right to tie dating.” Then, of course, the energetic and ambitious comrades learn that not all work is rewarded, and sometimes the right love is more important than professional skills, but they still continue to shoot down his legs butter from cream.
Do not accustom and forced labor
I know some very sad stories about children whose parents are literally forced to get a job: constant reproaches of the futility and burdens of their existence in the family. Both boys and girls left the house in a very young age, he was hired to work hard and humiliating, but would not hear: “Here your have nothing at all! Not yet earned! ”
Any good early start so did not result in employment. This is akin to the very early separation of the baby from the mother. He begins to grow and develop faster and better, on the contrary, zakuklivaetsya and empties into suspended animation, in a scientific way – fixation on the trauma of age. These small workers did not receive the necessary education, often fall into the criminal history. Some saved the emergence of “fairy godmother” in the face of a child’s room police staff, the shelter educators. One of my girl friends had saved just random passengers, all night on the train brainwashed her. And she went to Moscow to enroll in a public house (intelligent girl, been reading Dostoevsky).
So how to teach my child to work? And whether it is necessary to engage in it at all?
In my opinion, you can train the pet to the tray. A person can teach something, you can show it to something of interest to create motivation. But forcing a child to wash the dishes, you teach him not to work and help my mother.
One of my many nephews have just said to me feelingly speech that is labor. He was 12 years old, he scared Handstitched is going to be a heart surgeon. “So, – said Temy – labor – is not the word” difficult “. When I wonder, can I something one whole day to do. Or even a whole week. And when I am bored – I even half an hour can not sit still. And the school has things foolish and useless, music, for example, or a phonetic analysis of words. ” “In general, – summed up the he – I believe that to teach children to work is not necessary. They do very well accustomed, when there is a want. Or when they really something interesting. ”
And I fully agree with him.
Instead of a conclusion
Our young and very good class teacher arranged for us to practice in a real bakery. And instead of the hated wall laundering in school for a month koriore we sat behind the counter, released breads and sweets, believed to antediluvian accounts. It was just incredibly cool! You have no idea what it was for fun – put on a clean white robe, sit down at the cash register, it is important to say: “Since you ruble thirteen!”, And a low box office ringing bell when you open the cash drawer. And they look at you and are touched. All two of your working hours.