"Book of Rites," there is a saying: "widow does not cry at night," meaning that as a widow, to keep the festival, not in the middle of the night crying. As the saying goes: "widow in front of more than." Lonely night, a man crying sadly, is not to a man? Or by a man bullied? This is for social morality and public opinion does not allow. The Social Conditions of Widows in Ming and Qing Dynasties Many documents from the Ming and Qing Dynasties records of the women can be found, when the vast majority of widows, aged 14 to 30 years old. This age is the strong emotional women, but also a strong demand for sexual life, whether physical or psychological are very eager to caress the opposite sex. However, due to various evils in the feudal society, widows were forced to look only for "sex", which is a kind of destruction to the formation and development of their normal personality.
Women's widowhood is painful and lengthy. In order to resist the loneliness and emotional hunger of Nannai, they have adopted various methods and even set up some inhumane barriers for themselves to try to achieve their own aspirations. realm. From the modern point of view, really let a person can not bear. Some widow widowed, do not want to step out of the house, try to reduce communication with the outside world, especially with the opposite sex. "History of the Ming Dynasty" Lieutenant "recorded such a tragic thing, such as the county Hu Hu 25-year-old widowed, vowed not to home life one day neighborhood fire, fire to her home, her family came to save her, she put 7-year-old boy from the door to the sister-in-law, and then "hold three-year-old woman sitting in the fire in the death," rather die out of the house.
Such an example, "Guangzhou Chi" also recorded one: Ming Jiajing years, Nanhai County, Guangdong Zhu Huang, very young when widowed, she "move compliance ceremony", never step out of the home hall half a step, was At that time people called "female gentleman." There are widows, can not stand lonely, eager to remarry, but this is feudal society does not allow. Such as the Ming Jingtai years, Hebei widow "restless room", trying to remarry, the family ashamed, patriarch led the tribe "gregarious to assassinate" is extremely cruel. Some widow widowed, threw himself into doing business to accumulate wealth to resolve loneliness. "Gaomi County" records, the Qianlong years Gaomi County widow Fu Shoujie section 31 years, "holding a successful home", resulting in "family business five times in origin," become well-known female rich, strong woman.
Some widows can not bear the feelings of loneliness and hunger, often take the initiative to pursue human desire. "Clean barnyard class notes" records such a thing: scholar Zhao Rongjiang employed to the East widow Lu's tutor. One night, Zhao Rongjiang is reading, Lu's knock on the door, said: "Mr. a person is very lonely sleep, a very good temperament tonight, let me accompany you to sleep." Whether or not Lu's behavior was moral, she showed a normal woman's craving for sex, which was a strong testimony to the overwhelming demand of most widows. In addition, in order to strongly restrain the desire for sexual desire, some widows will also to cut off, broken fingers, suicide and other self-mutilation ways to try to resolve the psychological and physical pain. However, some can not restrain, so as to take masturbation, adultery, remarriage and other physiological satisfaction, such as "Golden Lotus" Pan. This is documented in the literature, not enumerated.
In general, the life of the widow in the Ming and Qing dynasties was bitter, lonely and lonely, and revealed the double oppression of the traditional society to the physical and mental health of this vulnerable group. We can also learn from the Ming and Qing women’s social life. Chastity in Ancient Society In ancient society, women tend to preserve the virginity is more important than the preservation of life. The so-called conservative virginity, which means a woman, or life and men do not have sexual intercourse, or only legal relationship with the person (only a husband) had sexual intercourse, otherwise it is “lost Zhen.” “Lost” includes premarital sex, extramarital sex, remarriage and rape, among others. This applies only to women, but not to men. Men and women outside the wife had sexual intercourse, at best, can only be described as “wrong”, but no one refers to “virginity”, chastity concept is the ancient society of men specifically for women set a statute.
From this, the concept of chastity from scratch, is a great progress in human history, it is to get rid of the marriage group marriage sexual relations, the consolidation of monogamous families, so that future generations can be healthy and normal reproduction, has not underestimated Historical role. At the same time, it is unilaterally imposed on the woman's yoke, since the date of the concept of chastity, the increasingly concentrated, strong, and gradually become the woman's highest social responsibility, at the same time to become a very brutal woman's spiritual oppression and Physical abuse, which in turn requires criticism and negation.
After the establishment of monogamy, especially under the feudal system, self-sufficient small-scale peasant economy based on the male-dominated individual family finally finalized. Because of such a family with a single and closed, it must highlight the special male patriarch in the family to dominate all the position, the woman further into the man's "ban" and accessories, shall not let others encroach.