Where a woman explode these phrases, why she “wants” or “does not want” child? I’m not a psychologist, I only express their thoughts.
I think, if a woman has no children, “want a child” – a myth. Or a stereotype. Or instinct. But this is not a conscious desire, because man is such that he wants something specific. For a woman, whose child does not – is an abstraction. And the child’s “want” for reasons unrelated to the child, because I love children (note that I am!), Because I want children (again – I – and I want in this situation is not a tautology, and the cause of the reasons), because it’s time, because the family, because they are cute, because it is necessary to extend the race, because I do not want to lost my wonderful family genes (though she had heard), because … And another million. Until the child was born, what little she understands that it is – the individual. Separate the world. And the world turns. And if those who “want” a child is ready for the world revolution, justifying it with a thousand reasons, that is, those who have these thousands of reasons not. Those who already have enough coups and nightmares in the world. Those child “does not want to.” And worst comes – abortion.
Terrible, because the woman does not know what the consequences of this action. Terrible, because the little creature inside – living. I would argue that the Internet is full of statements about women that abortion is not worsened, but improved their lives, that is “how to brush your teeth”, that they are happy. I will not argue. But I will add to these statements hot one important word. This word – yet.
As long as there are forces in nature, the environment, in order to keep the mind in the first stage of the tragedy – in the denial stage. Usually about five steps “shock / denial – aggression – trades – depression – acceptance” they say in the case of conscious tragedies such as the death of a loved one, a terrorist attack, a catastrophe. And no one says (or say a little – I have not seen such texts), that an unexpected pregnancy for a woman – it’s a shock. It’s stress. This is a tragedy. That’s horrible. This causes a flurry of fear and the desire to get rid of the fear that a woman can disguise it from myself. It never does not recognize that going to have an abortion “calmly and easily,” she really slammed the door within the heart, followed by a raging fire and flew tornadoes and hurricanes.
Why, you say, I’m so sure I say about this? Not because I’m a believer, and Orthodox believe. And because the universe, the cosmos, nature strives for creativity and creation, not of destruction and annihilation. Because the increase in production of offspring – it is natural for man and nature. Because any invasion of the human body – it’s a shock to him, the tragedy and violence. If this force is related to another by a living organism, which had no protective organisms other than the parent – is a double force. The violence in the first place over the other.
Any operation – an injury to the body. Even the removal of what is called malignant, that is harmful to the body. And here – the removal of the natural. Do not injury? What is there “How to brush your teeth!”
Why do women go for it? I repeat once again. Woman learns about unwanted pregnancy, experience a spectrum of emotions that are difficult to accept, analyze and describe. Fear, terror, despair, desire to stop this immediately. If there is no support for loved ones (and those who are going to have an abortion, most often relatives are not able to, they are not ready, do not want to support a woman) then the fear, terror and desperation reach incredible heights. This process can take days or weeks, and can shoot in a few hours. And the first step – shock or denial – in making disaster universe in which we live – or will not go to the second stage – the aggression, ending in abortion on the stage of denial and then turning into a sustained denial of “yes it is like brush your teeth,” or reach stage of aggression and aggression abortion on stage and goes into prolonged aggression “hands off my body.”
Now they say that they are happy. What they do not interfere. They do not regret what was done step. But it will take five or ten or twenty years, and suddenly a glass of cognac they begin to confess that abortion was made. They will not say “what have I done” or “I could.” They will just talk and talk and talk, and maybe get to the stage of “trades” and can proskochat into it and fall into a depression. And no one will spare them, deserved pity more than anything.
Unwanted pregnancy is. It is a fact. And for many women – it’s a shock, pain and horror. Unfortunately, social stereotypes actually formed two models, who live in the minds of women, not even being voiced. Or, “Oh, what a blessing, you have a baby,” or “God, what a horror where a child to me, I have … (family, apartment, car, job, career, no money, there is money, it is necessary to underline)”, and the news of the pregnancy includes these stereotypes.
People who are going to have an abortion or push him their loved ones, are desperately fighting for life in intensive care of a close relative. It would seem that you can turn off cell phones. But he’s still alive, you have to hope for a miracle! Or that lucky … A ball of cells in the uterus can not hope for a miracle?
We say “want or do not want children”, but much less often someone says, “I do not want these parents, I want out of those young billionaires.” Parents do not choose? Why? Which is easier – to eliminate these and to find new ones. Live? But I do not want to!
And he or she is a little, he did not choose. For him decide.
The woman learned that she was pregnant. Her stress. She’s hysterical. It seems that there is no escape. Shock. And she say – yes there is a way, to have an abortion. And she grabs for the abortion. Clutches in different ways – with tears, or laughing, or easily frantically. This is the way out!
But apologetically society. And close. That they should support. Saying: “Wait, you have a shock. Wait a bit, you now can not worry. In no case. Wait a week, it does not solve anything. This is scary. You think you’re alone. Do you think that you do not want. Wait. You are welcome. Wait. Try first to recognize the fact that in your new life. OK, try. You are welcome.
Here you can not worry now, honestly. Already now it is necessary to take care of yourself. Right now there is something small to you, but it is already alive. It responds. Wait a couple of days, please. And a couple of days. ”
Because the worst thing that nobody talks about overcoming the shock of pregnancy. So I did not read these materials. Everyone says, give birth. Or abortion.
But wait, please. Wait. In general, there is no support? Please, wait. It is a shock. This denial. It should be just five steps. Try to go through them.
Doctors do not frighten the poor mothers. Say good uterine pregnancy, give birth, have no fear.
Friends, do not frighten the poor mothers. Say you’re done, you will pass through the shock.
And if the pregnancy after rape?
Painfully. Unbearable. Fearfully. Horror. It would be desirable not to make abortion – my life reduced to a minimum. But if there is one person who will – can live. And he is able to live someone who has done nothing wrong. Embryo. Small fetus. He, they say believers already have a soul.
Every woman can go through the shock. After aggression. After bargaining with them: to leave or not to leave. Through depression. And come to acceptance. In addition, it is – a child. This – a new life. It – space. Galaxy.
Help them to survive this shock. You are welcome.