I Hear the phrase 10 years ago, I would have laughed out loud. And at the temple would be twirled for effect. In my mind there was only one image of a young mother – Near plump housewife who does not live and drags killing his monotonous existence, hoping that blessed day when come back to work, people, and herself at the same time – finally! – Will look like a man.
Somehow in the last year at college with a friend, we thought about the career plans who are what he wanted to achieve, and, wondering, thinking:
– Do not forget that two years is necessary to erase from life – to the decree.
– Exactly! Yes, not two, but all three …
That’s what I thought, the decree – is years out of life. The situation in which the sinking of which often do not come back, turned in the “aunts”. So I think and I’m sure many people think today. And what is most unpleasant, such thoughts and fears push someone’s motherhood for an indefinite period. Yes, these women I meet regularly. Afraid of “losing oneself” get stuck in the swamp of daily routine, dig in diapers, bottles and pots, they do not see the prospects that bode decree. Although this is, in fact (which I was convinced by experience), the most productive and intense time in a woman’s life, one has only to change the angle of view.
Let us leave aside things like the happiness of being a mother, the joy and the ocean of positive emotions, which bring the children themselves. I want to talk not about this. And on the self, which is so important for today’s mothers, to finding yourself, develop their own talents and that a woman on maternity leave, as it turned out, do not lose yourself, do not die as a person, and often vice versa – finds and acquires.
Many of my friends, young mothers (and I, by the way, among them), but lost in a decree finally allowed themselves to do what is really like. In a professional sense. It’s simple: the rhythm of life has changed, free time was very little, it appears most often in fits and starts, a little bit. And spend those precious nuggets on boring unloved work just sorry. This is the most coveted free time you want to spend at your leisure. Of course, there are exceptions and the different situations of life, but I am deliberately talking about moms who decree began his professional life again and launched it in the other direction.
One of my friend after childbirth has become a professional photographer. Lenses, cameras, lenses attracted her always, but she was afraid to take the first step, I was not sure of himself, and then began to take off his daughter, children friends, “just for themselves” completed the course of her work saw the judges and is now in great demand as a professional. Other fascinated needlework, knitting and wallow so much that began to make on the sale of bags, vests and hats for children. The third opened an art school for children, as her offspring began to show an interest in painting. Another – a children’s club, and it all started with the fact that no one with whom to leave their children, and the income was needed desperately. Someone began to write articles and stories, someone – was engaged in tutoring. And how many mothers find themselves in the culinary and pastry art! Social networks are full of pictures of their cakes masterpieces. Among my friends there at least five confectioners who have no shortage of orders.
It turns out that the decree has become for many people the most “magical Pendeli”, which is lacking to finally take action, to develop, to seek, to try new things. Break a few minutes from the maelstrom of trouble off the top of the child’s favorite fragrant, to plunge into a tedious chore, or to sort through the documents in the office unloved – the test is not for everyone. As a result, women are trying to spend time on what they like and brings pleasure.
Speaking of office. There are lucky that before the decree doing things you love and be happy to return to the system of working mothers. But it’s other staff. Just saying! Mistaken are those who think that a woman caring for a child of three years, is degraded. None of the training courses can not be compared with the school, which is a woman during this time. Here you and work in multitasking mode (until the child is eating a cookie, Mom manages to wash and dry his head, wiped the dust, to fill the bed and talk with her husband on the phone), and the ability to act in a short time (the child everything you need right now , no two minuty- half an hour or tomorrow), and the ability to continually make decisions, negotiate (try to two-year contract), enthrall, entertain – and at the same time do it all around the clock, seven days a week and the hospital, and still look presentable. And it’s not extreme and extremes – an ordinary life of any mother.
Jokes, jokes, but my working girlfriend admitted that she had often lingered in the office, because I do not have time to do the finish, it reports often had to rule, and now she goes home at exactly 18 hours (hurries home to his son), surprisingly all managing and making virtually no errors. And I know of cases where the production of crafts in the garden or the preparation of non-matinee mother prompted new original idea for the work that she then happily presented the authorities.
It does not matter whether you come back after childbirth to their original location, or find yourself in something completely new – a maternity leave and still guarantees you a new hobby, and maybe not one. Personally, I finally mastered chess, and not at the level of “pawn moves straight, the horse with the letter G”, and serious. Just because my son took up chess in the circle, and together we need to do your homework. My former classmate because of his daughter fulfilled his childhood dream – to go to ballet lessons and even stood on pointe (until the daughter in a nearby classroom rehearsed “pa”, had something to occupy yourself in the waiting process). Another mother after her daughter was engaged in figure skating, which “sick” since childhood, but somehow there was no time, did not reach the hands, and other circumstances and other. Other – mastered tennis, the third – beading, and then, and more – and after their children.
Once again, I come back to a completely fair words from our pediatric clinic: mom – really very easy-going people. Around them all boils and turns. They constantly get involved in all sorts of activities, sometimes even through the “can not”. They do not need long to swing – this skill is also very well trained children, requiring at times mutually exclusive things with a difference of five minutes.
Today’s moms are mobile than ever – thanks to cars, slings, diapers, carry cot and other appliances. And active. You can lead a very busy life in the truest sense of the word “no separation from the child.” It would be a desire. And do not be afraid. We often do drive ourselves into a strange frame like these: “Well, the videos, I’m the mother of the family”, “how do I go to the coffee shop with a child, my place in the playground,” “sewing had to try before giving birth, it’s too late, not before. ” Yes, life is changed after the decree and very strong. And in what direction – swamp or new opportunities – you decide.
And all this talk about housewives descended, rastolstevshie broody, an idle, can only cook borscht – old stereotype, which, by the way, tend to support those who are on maternity leave and did not happen.