Even if your text no one will, and it will not be issued, the process of writing itself – absolutely magical. Immersed in a kind of special status and forget about everything, even forgetting to eat. In the morning you sit behind the text, look – and already evening. This trance.
Writing a book – it is terrible. You become very vulnerable. It seems that anyone can say, ‘You fool! Why have you decided that you have the right to write? It is better to be cooked soup. ” But I could not help it and went on.
Dive into the text was scary. It seemed that nothing happens, and instead, spend a lot of time to take care of children, and of forces is not clear on that. Such thoughts were painful. One day I told the priest that I wanted to write. He replied: “To write something, you must first something of themselves to represent.” I was unsettled. I decided that I will not write. However, it lasted two days.
After the “dull garden” next place of work was publishing “Nikea”. This is where the book was published, but at first Marina did not even dreamed of.
Hippie, mature relationship, and modern teenagers
– This book – not a history of the hippie movement. But as a young man I talked a little with people, and some realities knew I was a hippie girlfriend, her boyfriend was in a band. My personal experience is limited hippie trip to St. Petersburg as a student in the early 90s. Then I looked narrowly to these people, but at some point scared. There was a feeling that I can play too, some go abroad. I was scared, and I went from there. Why I wanted to immerse the heroes precisely in this environment – I can not say for sure, maybe because it left some desire to live the life at that time. When a person writes, he is responsible for himself some questions. For me it is a matter of choice between self-realization and the rest. And the question of God’s presence in your life. It seems to me that this question every arises: Does God hear me?
The entire medical history, which it describes is real. I did not come up, and my conscience is clear here. Because I have heard accusations that it does not happen, it’s kind of a fairy tale when a person with metastatic goes into remission. Unfortunately, I have now lost sight of the man whose medical history I have described, but I know that a few years after that, he was definitely alive, he had a family, a child. I hope that he is alive today.
The final book, of course, open, happy ending, not even if the hero did not die, as they more likely to be.
My book is shocked by the fact that it, like a fly in a piece of amber – my experiences and throwing 14 years. Where is it from? This – is yours?
Mine, of course. The experiences and emotions, it is clear where – from the experience.
But as an adult to get to these layers teenage experience? Or it was written then?
Something was written then. But something – left from those times. Some things do not go. It is clear that I now feel differently, but some things close to me now.
Why prosperous adult man to dive into the depths of teenage reflection?
To be honest, I have a feeling that I have not come out. I did not have to drive yourself especially in this state.
Good shows youthful ambivalence, when a person wants to be understood, but it does everything that it did not understand. Well, that was found Woodman, a man who was interested to solve Lita.
There has to be some light at the end of the tunnel. Not everyone has to be awful.
It seems to me that the relationship between the characters gradually become mature. The heroine eventually gets out of his teenage nightmare. And how do you see mature relationship between people?
In our publishing house “Nikea” out of the book of a mature relationship, for example, the book “Man and Woman” Andrew Lorgus priest and psychologist Olga Krasnikova, I edited it even a little. And what does a mature relationship for me and how my own relationship – mature, I can not say. With the husband we are together 22 years old, and I have a husband that with him is never boring. Probably married with some predictable man, I would have died of boredom. It seems to me that the majority of immature relationships first, and then, if people want to, they matured, something turns out. Perhaps marriage – constant adjustment to each other, during which time my husband on some things cured, I hope that I am he, too, something helped. By the way, without it I probably would not dare to write this book. He was very supportive of me.
How do you imagine the reader? This book was not written for teenagers?
Absolutely! When I began to say that my book is – first of all, for teenagers, I was outraged. But I know that several of my friends gave the book to teenagers, and those like it. And me it is pleasant. I believe that the teenage audience – very important. On the one hand, this lowbrow readers, they are very lenient, usually all take, rarely criticized. But, on the other hand, all read in adolescence can just sink down into the soul, then what will be remembered for life. For me, these structure-started several novels and short stories from the magazine “Youth”, by which I would pass today. And then – they formed me. Some things can act strongly and deeply in adolescence. This is very responsible, but of course, I did not think that teenagers are among the readers.
Are current teenagers like us at that age?
They are free of us. I think all of us sitting in the Soviet fear is so old, the years of the 30’s. We have a meeting room at the publishing house, there is only a piece of furniture and a table lamp – so everyone who comes there, says the same thing: “This interrogation room? As in the Lubyanka. ” I believe in our children that there is no fear. We divide people into friends and foes – to those who are younger, it seems to me, it does not, they focus on other things.
A teenage throwing, of which there are many in this book, there is at present teenagers?
Well, of course. It seems to me that it is not going away, it does not depend on time.
– Reaction to the book different from all my friends, sometimes quite the opposite of what I expected. I think that sometimes people want to read the book, you would like to write for yourself and seeing another disillusioned. Many have said that the book was an opportunity to remember the youth. A friend wrote me an email that read again and felt 16 years.
Several people said they wept over the book, though I did not set such a task. For me it was unexpected and strange. This, of course, is not a criterion of good literature, when a book crying, but then, the book makes an emotional impact, which is not bad.
I do not know why the hero began to call Forester, I do not remember e the time when the name appeared. First, the Forester does not add up. He gets some boring, could not find his way, but then I saw a man whom he looked like. When there was the appearance, it is visualized, and everything went better, he immediately began to live my life. At first, you think over some things, and then when you start to write, everything is built very differently.
One of the first I showed the text to the priest, to which I go for 20 years. I thought: it will be greatly swear, but I still give him to read. And father Vladislav after the service comes from the altar: “Maroussia, come here! I read. I like it. But it would be better if he died in the end. “
Keep out of the hands of the book – a strange feeling, not yet digested it. Creative plans I have. All she wanted to, I wrote until I had nothing more to say